Some Thoughts On Aging

Submitted by ShannonHilson on August 29, 2008 - 2:21pm.

I think about the subject of getting older a lot. Aging is really interesting to me -- how we change and how we adapt to that change. Everyone seems to be different as far as how they take it.

When I was younger, I thought I would really hate getting older. I thought getting wrinkles, and possibly not being thought of as some physically perfect little nymphette anymore, would be the end of the world, and I don't really know why. It's not as if I ever actually liked the attention, or even thought of myself as a natural beauty. I always saw myself as having a great sense of style, but when it came to just... my natural features and figure, I've never actually liked any of it. I've always thought of myself as beautiful less because of what I had, and more because of what I could make of it if I tried.

I don't know what difference I ever thought a few wrinkles, or a little sag here or there, would really make as far as that was concerned. After all, you can get by on a great sense of style when you're 80 just as well as you can when you're 20. I guess I just didn't know any better than to just listen to what my elders and betters thought on the subject at the time -- that I was immeasurably lucky to still be so young and that it would suck balls to get older.

Now that I'm in my 30's though? I'm finding that the older I get, the less my ego is really wrapped up in how I look and the more I can appreciate the ways in which my age is starting to show. I won't go so far as to say that I no longer care how I look. However, I will say that my ideas of what's beautiful and why have changed a lot over the years.

I will also say that looks in general are nowhere near the top of my priority list anymore, and I feel that's really opened up my ability to accept and enjoy the aging process. I like that the older I get, the more seriously people take me, and I love that I actually am finally starting to get where I have some life experience to look back on. I'm excited about who I am and who I'm becoming. To be honest, I wouldn't have my 20's back for all the tea in China.

So I'm curious. How do all of you feel about getting older, especially when it comes to looking your age? If you're under 30, is it something you're afraid of? If you're over 30, is it something you find you're enjoying so far? And whatever your age, and however you feel, where do you think your attitude comes from? Tell me all about it.

  1. Balduran (not verified) said,

    September 1, 2008 - 8:17pm -

    It may sound odd, but i wish i was 30 right now (In other words - 10 years older), i have a... urm, personal reason for that (Note me on dA if you're curious).

    I don't see 30 as _old_. No ever near it, i think it's hm, the perfect time in your life (if you may call it that way) - You're not old, but you're no longer a hot-blooded teenager, you're independant by that time (or should be, heh) etc.
    *AHEM* ANYWAYS, as usual, my answer is ambiguous.
    I'm both affraid of aging and not at all.

    Per looks, i'm terrified by the fact that i might loose my long hair one day (They're the only thing that only i decide about) and be bald (Which would make me look like my father... but that's another story). I don't really care about wrinkles or having grey hair (Hey, i WANT to have grey hair!).

    I'm also scared.... no, mortified, by the fact that i might be incapacitated in any way. Either from memory loss, not being able to move (Yay for unhealthy and destructive life style), or stuff like that (Generously assuming i'll live that long).

    However i'm not affraid of getting old in general. I hardly go out and do stuff now, so my activity probably won't change THAT much. It's the effects of aging that make me nervous. Now that i think of it, i feel really old already (How was it again? We're as old as we feel).
    This might be the effect of the fact (Don't you find it annoying that in english you have to use 'the' every 3 words?) that i'm not affraid of death.
    In fact i want to die (For various reasons), but i can't kill myself because... well, i don't want my love to be sad...

    Gah! I know - tl;dr, but i get all retrospective up-my-arse.

    Also - Forgive me for the abuse of brackets and pointless comments in them, my perceiving of reality sort of prevents me from keeping on one thought track (Again, another story (Argh, again a comment (And... oh snap. Well, goodnight and Namaste!)))

    PS.
    If it's not too much of a problem - answer me on dA (if you intend to answer this off course), i'll probably forget about this page in the morning,

    PPS.
    Yes, i don't talk much, but when i start, i can't stop.

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